Monday, July 27, 2009

Buggered, Battered and Bring it on!




It's been an exhausting weekend. I've had to work night duty at work, which obviously puts my body clock way out of being in the 'normal' range. Today has marked reaching over the 1 week mark of having no diet coke. Instead I'm drinking lots of diet mineral water, water and tea. Seem to be coping. Still feel I need something 'sweet', but cravings are no where near as bad as they were, so thinking diet coke had something to play in that.

I'm addicted to muesli bars at the moment. Don't know hot to get off them or to get ones that are a good substitute. Weight watchers has recommended that go for soup or something 'filling' instead of museli bars, but I'm finding that difficult. Thinking maybe a muesli weight watchers slice is the way to go and might be a bit better than 1.5-3 point musli bars.

I'm starting to get in the habit of wanting to eat 'healthier'. I got up after sleeping 4 hours from my night duty today and after going to do some shopping felt like I was about to faint. Every fast food shop that passed I was looking at thinking what could I have to stop me feeling nauseated and to fix my energy level....but I didn't go in. Instead had a fun size milky way, picked nephew up from school and made a salad sandwich followed by an apple. Was quite surprised and 'proud' of myself. Don't remember really ever doing this. Something to feel good about.

My house has no chips,no biscuits, no ice cream, a few fun size frozen milky ways and no musli bars. It feels alright too, however am going to persevere with finding a good alternative to musli bars. Why do I love them so much? Don't really know.

Fernwood went well last week. Did a weight session last Friday and am still sore from it. It's good though. Made me realise how much I miss it, so will persevere with going. Got to get back into it. Fernwood scales and Wii scales showed I'd put on 5 kgs, not sure if it had something to do with TTOM or something else. But keep persevering and I know I'll get there.

In the meantime taking it one day at a time. The diet coke demon is still around, but it's getting smaller and disappearing a bit more which is great. I know still might be tough, but I'm getting there. One day at a time.


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This is all new to me......

This is all indeed new to me! The blog stuff I mean. I've been wanting to do this for a while and as you can see I thought what the heck, I'm just going to do it! A working progress you might say? I think so. But with time you can only improve? Don't they say that with everything?

I'm not sure I feel that way about weight loss at the moment. I've hit my 1 year journey marker, yet I look at what I have achieved and start to question myself....is '27 kgs' something really to gloat about? To be proud of? Thats half a kilo a week, which fits in perfectly with what ww recommend...yet its simply not good enough for me!

'Why?' you ask? I think comparing myself to everyone else and what they have achieved has led me to doubting myself and feeling pretty crappy about how far I have come. I wanted to be so badly one of those people that say "Look at me, look at what I've achieved!". I try...but those words simply fade into the "Look at what? Big deal 27 kgs!". I'm a bit of a critic. Actually I'm a severe critic....of myself that is. Hence, why I've got myself into this situation in the first place.

So at the moment with all of lifes curve balls that are thrown my way, I simply have one motto "One day at a time!".....oh and perhaps one more "When your mind says give up, hope whispers one more try". This is what I'm living by at the moment and I must say with all the great support I'm getting from some wonderful fantastic people, hope is whispering a lot more to me!

I'll keep you updated on how things are going....in the meantime I'll keep plodding along and know that "I CAN DO THIS!".